Tag Archives: Jokes

Train Story

A man and a woman who are strangers find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. They both go to sleep, the man on the top bunk, the woman on the lower.

In the middle of the night the man leans over, wakes the woman and says, “I’m sorry to bother you, but I`m awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly get me another blanket?”

The woman leans out and, with a glint in her eye, says, “I have a better idea! Just for tonight, let’s pretend we’re married.”

The man is thrilled at the idea, so the woman says,

“Good…Now go get your own damn blanket!”

Funny Telegrams!!

TELEGRAM #1
A daughter sends a telegram to her father on her clearing B.Ed exams,
which the father receives as:

“Father, your daughter has been successful in BED.”

TELEGRAM #2
A husband, while he is on a business trip to a hill station sends a telegram to his wife :
“I wish you were here.”

The message received by wife: “I wish you were her.”

TELEGRAM #3
A wife with near maturing pregnancy goes to railway station to return to her husband. At the reservation counter, while her turn came, it was the last ticket. Taking pity on a very old lady next to her in the line, she offered her berth to the old lady and sent a telegram to her husband

which reached as: “Shall be coming tomorrow, heavy rush in the train, gave birth to an old lady.”

TELEGRAM #4
A man wants to celebrate his wife’s Birthday by throwing a party. So he goes to order a birthday cake. The salesman asks him what message he wants put on the cake. Well he thinks for a while and says:

let’s put, “you are not getting older you are getting better”.

The salesman asks “how do you want me to put it?” The man says, Well put

“You are not getting older”, at the top and “You are getting better” at the bottom.

The real fun didn’t start until the cake was opened the entire party watched
the message decorated on the cake:

“You are not getting older at the top, You are getting better at the bottom”

Fwd: Newton Laws

1st Law
A Desi will continue to stay in the United States of America due to the inertia of the Green Card until and unless an external force called Deportation is applied.

2nd Law
The force of deportation id defined by F = ma;

Where m = Amount Of Money Desi earned/saved in USA.

a = dm/dt, the rate at which Desi saved money.

(This is contrary to the common belief that Desi will return back after
making lot of money)

3rd Law

For each and every Desi that goes back to Desh for a temporary visit, a
Desi of the opposite sex will come to USA on a permanent visit.

Appollo Hospital

A couple went to the sex therapists office at Appollo Hospital .

The doctor asked, “What can I do for you?”

The man said, “Will you watch us having sex, for your expert analysis?”

The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed.

When the couple finished, the doctor said, “There’s nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse” and charged them Rs.300.

This happened several weeks in a row.

The couple would make an appointment, have intercourse with no problems, pay the doctor and then leave.

Finally the doctor asked, “Just exactly what are you trying to find out?”

The man said, “We’re not trying to find out anything. She’s married and we can’t go to her house – I’m married and we can’t go to my house.

Cinnamon Grand charges Rs. 10,000, Taj charges Rs.7 ,000, Galadari charges Rs.6000. We do it here for Rs.300
and I get that back from Medical Claim ………

Sardar – Jokes

How will you destroy a submarine full of sardars?
Simple. Just knock the door and they will open it.

——

Sardar got into a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket.
He gave Rs.10/- and took the ticket and said April fool. I have pass.

——

Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the Computer.
Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it all right.

——

On a romantic day sardar’s girlfriend asks him. Darling on our Engagement day will you give me a ring.
Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.

——

2 sardars were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
Sardar 2 : Don’t worry, I have one more.

——

Sardar was busy removing a wheel from his auto. A man asks sardar why are you removing a wheel from your auto.
Sardar : Cant you read the board. Parking is only for 2 wheeler.

——

Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with “T”.
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai. Hamaara gaadi Petrol se start hoti hai.

——

Boss : Where were you born ?
Sardar : Punjab
Boss : which part ?
Sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in Punjab .

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