Category Archives: funny

Scary Coincidence

Another coincidence like the Lincoln & Kennedy

This is actually really freaky!! (Mainly the end part, but read it all first)

1) New York City has 11 letters
2) Afghanistan has 11 letters.
3) Ramsin Yuseb (The terrorist who threatened to destroy the Twin Towers in 1993) has 11 letters.
4) George W Bush has 11 letters.

This could be a mere coincidence, but this gets more interesting:
1) New York is the 11th state.
2) The first plane crashing against the Twin Towers was flight number 11.
3) Flight 11 was carrying 92 passengers. 9 + 2 = 11
4) Flight 77 which also hit Twin Towers, was carrying 65 passengers. 6+5 = 11
5) The tragedy was on September 11, or 9/11 as it is now known. 9 + 1+ 1 = 11
6) The date is equal to the US emergency services telephone number 911. 9 +1 + 1 = 11

Sheer coincidence? Read on and make up your own mind:

1) The total number of victims inside all the hi-jacked planes was 254. 2 + 5 + 4 = 11.
2) September 11 is day number 254 of the calendar year. Again 2 + 5 + 4 = 11.
3) The Madrid bombing took place on 3/11/2004. 3 + 1 + 1 + 2 + 4 = 11.
4) The tragedy of Madrid happened 911 days after the Twin Towers incident.

Now this is where things get totally eerie:

The most recognized symbol for the US, after the Stars & Stripes, is the Eagle. The following verse is taken from the Quran, the Islamic holy book:

“For it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken a fearsome Eagle. The wrath of the Eagle would be felt throughout the lands of Allah while some of the people trembled in despair still more rejoiced: for the wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah and there was peace.”
That verse is number 9.11 of the Quran.

Unconvinced about all of this still ..?

Try this and see how you feel afterwards, it made my hair stand on end:

Open Microsoft Word and do the following:

1. Type in capitals Q33 NY. This is the flight number of the first plane to hit one of the Twin Towers.

2. Highlight the Q33 NY.

3. Change the font size to 48.

4. Change the actual font to the WINGDINGS

What do you think now?!!

Good Bye “Mom”….

Good bye, Mom …

It looks like a sad story…but do continue reading to the end!…..It? s a lesson to learn……. ……… ..

I was walking through the supermarket to pick up a few things when I noticed an old lady following me around.

Thinking nothing of it, I ignored her and continued on. Finally I went to the checkout line, but she got in front of me.

“Pardon me,” she said, “I’m sorry if my staring at you has made you feel uncomfortable. It’s just that you look like my son, who just died recently.”

“I’m very sorry,” I said to her, “Is there anything I can do for you?”

“Yes,” she said, “As I’m leaving, can you say ‘Good bye, Mom?’ It would make me feel so much better.”

“Sure,” I said. An odd request, but no harm would come of it.

As the old woman was leaving, I called out, “Good Bye, Mom!”

As I stepped up to the checkout counter, I saw that my total was $1027.50.

“How can that be?” I asked, “I only purchased a few things!”

“Your mother said that you would pay for her,” said the clerk.

Unusual small business idea: tiny mobile post office

What can be better then having a business that brings joy to yourself and make your clients happy? The small business idea that I describe below is just perfect: catchy idea, low budget, interesting and unusual business!

wsps

The World’s Smallest Postal Service (WSPS) is a company founded by Lea Redmont.

She sets her tiny mobile post office in different cafes, restaurants and shops where clients and passers-by can write a small letter to their friends and relatives.

But this won’t be a simple note, Lea turns it into “world’s smallest letter”: it is transcribed on a miniature desk in the tiniest of script, sealed with a miniscule wax seal with the sender’s initial pressed into it, packaged up with a magnifying glass in a glassine envelope, and finished off with a large wax seal.

I’m sure recipients are always delighted to receive such a chef d’oeuvre!

Stupid Argument

Last year I replaced all the windows in my house with those expensive double-pane energy efficient kind. But this week I got a call from the contractor complaining that his work had been completed a whole year ago and I hadn’t paid for them.

Boy oh boy, did we go around! Just because I’m a woman doesn’t mean that I am automatically stupid.

So, I proceeded to tell him just what his fast talking sales guy had told me… that in one year the windows would pay for themselves.

There was silence on the other end, so I just hung up, and I haven’t heard back from him. Guess I won that stupid argument.

The Swimming Oranges and the Floating Bananas

The last day of Chinese New Year (its called Chap Goh Meh in Hokkien – a Chinese dialect) is also known as the Chinese Valentine’s Day. For most Malaysian Chinese, they knew well of this certain ritual that happens every year on this day. Originated from Penang, Malaysia, this interesting ritual involves tossing tangerine/mandarin oranges or bananas by the singles into the pond or sea or river or any place with water in hope that their future partner will pick up their fruits.

And this year in Malaysia, it was the most happening event for the single men and women in more than 3 places in the state of Selangor itself.
Yes, they literally throw the tangerines and bananas into the pond. Like this:

nst-1

How does it work, you may wonder. nst-2

Well, its pretty simple actually, single women writes their names, phone numbers and some messages on tangerine oranges while the men does the same on bananas. Some women will write names and phone numbers while the more expressive ones will write messages, draw cute smileys or perhaps even their star sign.Men are probably more straight-to-the-point, minus the mushy messages.“See you”? Maybe on the other side is “I hope you will find me”.

nst-4

So after the writing and tossing, the fruit fishing starts! And boy, they are so well prepared! Some brought long poles with net to fish out the fruits! Some of them brought a small note book or phones so they could fish out a few oranges or bananas and jot down the necessary details on it. Then they toss the fruits back to the pond! How clever.

Smart Solidiers Survive

There were three generals, one Chinese, an Iraqi, and a Turk. They were bragging about how good each of their armies were.

The Chinaman said, “My army would kill themselves for their country!”

Then he put a platoon in a little room and told them, “When this feather hits the floor I want all of you to shoot yourselves!”

He then went outside the room and five seconds later there were numerous gunshots and everyone in the room was dead.

Next came the Turkish General and he said the same thing to one of his platoons. About seven seconds later they heard gunshots and once again everyone was dead.

Finally came the Iraqi and he did the same to his platoon. Several seconds past and there were no gunshots. They decided to wait a little longer. Then several more seconds past and still no gunshots.

Finally they went in and the whole Iraqi platoon was on the floor blowing under the feather to keep it up.

Why Wives Love Frying Pans

A man is quietly reading his paper when his wife sneaks up behind him and whacks him on the head with a frying pan.

“What was that for?” he exclaims.

“That was for the piece of paper in your pants pocket with the name Jenny written on it”, she replies.

“Two weeks ago when I went to the races, Jenny was the name of one of the horses I bet on”, he explains. She looks satisfied, apologizes, and goes off to do work around the house.

Three days later he is watching TV when his wife bashes him on the head with an even bigger frying pan, knocking him out cold. Upon re-gaining consciousness the man asks why she had hit again.

Wife replies. “Your horse phoned”.

Jay Leno On Stocks & Finance :-)

1. The US has made a new weapon that destroys people but keeps the building standing,. Its called the stock market – Jay Leno

2. Do you have any idea how cheap stocks are?? Wall Street is now being called Wal Mart Street – Jay Leno

3. The difference between a pigeon and a London investment banker. The pigeon can still make a deposit on a BMW

4. What’s the difference between a guy who lost everything in Las Vegas and an investment banker? A tie!

5. The problem with investment bank balance sheet is that on the left side nothing’s right and on the right side nothing’s left.

6. I want to warn people from Nigeria who might be watching our show, if you get any emails from Washington asking for money, it’s a scam. Don’t fall for it – Jay Leno

7. Bush was asked about the credit crunch. He said it was his favorite candy bar – Jay Leno

8. The rescue bill was about 450 pages. President Bush’s copy is even thicker. They had to include pictures – Jay Leno

9. President Bush’s response was to meet some small business owners in San Antonio last week. The small business owners are General Motors, General Electric and Century 21 – Jay Leno

10. What worries me most about the credit crunch, is that if one of my cheques is returned stamped ‘insufficient funds’. I won’t know whether that refers to mine or the banks.

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